so... what's up with your parents?

i can't stop myself. this is the last time i ponder something weighty. but now that i am a parent, and, as i hinted in the last post, i am thankful that my kids are live western kids not dead middle-eastern kids. seen in the larger context of the world, my upbringing of enough food and toughskins jeans seems almost luxurious. but back then it seemed traummatic that i didn't have jordache jeans.

my parents definitely chose the free market approach to child rearing - provide the basics but don't meddle with social and personal development issues. i was forever bitter when i paid my own way through college and marveled at all the lazy free-riders dumber than me getting better jobs, wearing better clothes and having more fun than me. but now that i am older, i am doing ok on my own and i feel a little pride in that. i even defended my parents when my one of my sisters, chief lobbyist of cornell's agricultural college, no less, dissed them for being unsupportive.

it's like we were born in a junkyard, i told her, but our parents gave us a really good toolbox. then we built a really sweet hotrod from crap we found laying around, and then one day, we drove out of the junkyard. and because we built the hotrod, whenever it broke down, we could fix it ourselves. she said that is the stupidest thing she ever heard and that i am a hillbilly. it's probably true.

anyway, now i am raising my kids in a totally different way. am i spoiling them? should i be yelling at them or smacking them around a little? i don't know. they seem much happier than i was, and they are full of self-confidence, BUT, are they ready for the school of hard knocks? who knows. someday if any of you ever meet my kids, let me know if you think they're jerks or fine, upstanding kids.

and please, if you want to, share your thoughts on your parents. they define your life and who you are, either because or in spite of them.